There are few things I hate more than moving. I’ll take going to the dentist, drinking decaf coffee, even a visit to the DMV before volunteering to move stuff. Especially when it comes to the those pieces of furniture that you just can’t ever seem to get a good grip on. You know the ones, that 300 lb. couch and easy lounger, that no matter how you pick it up…just never feels right. It’s this in mind that got me thinking about prayer. Truth is, prayer is a lot like that couch or easy-lounger when you get down to it. For all the messages I’ve heard, read, and even taught on prayer…I’m realizing that prayer is simply hard to handle. It’s not something that can easily be boxed in or figured out nor do I believe was it ever meant to be. It’s not about repeating the same words over and over again, it’s not about having a good pastoral tone to our voice, or five steps to effective prayer. See I think what makes prayer often so hard to handle at times is that very little about prayer is clean, neat, and proper. But rather…prayer I’m coming to find is messy, real, and honest. It’s tears, it’s cries, it’s laughter, it’s joy, it’s silence. See it’s only when we come to really let go of the need to fit our prayers in a convenient, nice and neat little package…that we come to really discover the beautiful mess of prayer. There is a great poem from “Guerillas of Grace” which speaks to this:
How shall I pray?
Are tears prayers, Lord?
Are screams prayers,
or groans…or sighs…or curses?
Can trembling hands be lifted to you, or clenched fists
or the cold sweat that trickles down my back or the cramps that knot my stomach?
Will you accept my prayers, Lord, my real prayers,
rooted in the muck and mud and rock of my life,
and not just the pretty, cut-flower, gracefully arranged bouquet of words?
Will you accept me, Lord, as I really am,
messed up mixture of glory and grime?–Ted Loder
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